Panic

26 days to go and all the preparation seems lost. I have over prepared and have to do all the work again.
Fitness gone, clean rooms now dirty and general tidiness generally messy.

I have to learn how to use a camera, different computer and start a weight-loss and good eating regime. Lose 10 kilos, walk 15 kilometres a day and look 10 years younger..... and it is less than a month. The micro-planning is like an old trip gone. I have to relearn and relive. Marking to do, programs to write and reports to be done in less than a month!

There have been a few other things I was not ready for - prepared but not ready for them to be over - my fourth child to be born, my fourth child to be weaned and my full time working life to end. I have filled my life with three jobs that are more than a full time work load but it doesn't feel the same. Time does not wait for one to be ready. There are other things I expect but may not be ready for at the time.....

I am so not ready for this trip despite having my bag packed and everything booked. Even my handbag is packed and ready, but not my mind.
Heart is ready, body not, mind muddled.
Count down - it is actually 25 now - this day is nearly over....panic.